Last Sunday, before I headed off for Brisbane, our family embarked on a meaningful journey: The Table Talk Project. This time, we chose to do it over breakfast, and I spent the morning preparing a scrumptious meal of bacon, eggs, sourdough bread, hashbrowns, and a medley of vegetables. Gathered around the table were most of us, although one was absent. It was a moment of togetherness, filled with great conversation and insights. The conversation starter we chose, through the Back at the Table tool, was: “How don’t you like to be communicated to?” This simple question opened up a world of understanding, highlighting the importance of recognising that effective communication within a family is not one-size-fits-all.
Communication Styles Vary:
Research in the realm of communication has shown that where things often go awry is when we assume that everyone in our family communicates and receives communication in the same way. This assumption can lead to misunderstandings, conflicts, and a lack of harmony in the household. In reality, people have diverse communication styles and preferences, and it’s crucial to recognise and respect these differences.
For example, some family members may prefer fast-paced communication, such as text messages or quick phone calls. They can handle multiple pieces of information at once and respond promptly. On the other hand, some may be more reflective and need time to process requests and information. It’s essential to offer them one instruction at a time and in a measured, clear manner. In our family, we discovered that our son, who has a mild intellectual disability, gets overwhelmed with too much information, and it’s best to give him one instruction at a time. Our daughter, on the other hand, needs a calm and sit-down conversation, without any yelling, to receive information effectively.
Understanding and Respecting Differences:
The Table Talk Project provides a safe space and time for family members to openly discuss these communication differences and preferences. This initiative encourages us to embrace these distinctions and work toward more effective and harmonious communication within the family.
Benefits of Understanding:
The benefits of understanding how not to communicate with family members are far-reaching. By recognising and respecting each family member’s unique communication style and needs, we can foster a more peaceful environment at home. When we implement these insights into our daily interactions, we reduce misunderstandings, arguments, and tension. Instead, we create an atmosphere of understanding, support, and cooperation, which is essential for a happy and healthy family life.
Effective communication is the cornerstone of a well-functioning family. By acknowledging and embracing the diversity of communication styles within our family, we pave the way for more peaceful and harmonious relationships. The Table Talk Project is a powerful tool that allows us to open up discussions, gain insights, and make positive changes in our family dynamics. As we move forward, armed with a better understanding of how not to communicate, we can create a loving and nurturing environment where each family member feels heard and respected.
